Communication in couples... the impact of the pandemic!
We’ve had a crazy 2 years! Over the past 2 years, we’ve been confronted with exceptional situations we never thought we’d experience in our entire existence. This pandemic has forced us to adapt and adjust in a very short space of time. We’ve had to change many of our habits, such as what we do, how we work, how we communicate and so on.
This brings me to the subject of communication. We may have encountered difficulties in this area with our friends, family, colleagues and also with our spouses. Some of us have had to telecommute, and have spent much more time than normal in each other’s company. How did the couples cope with stressful events they’d never encountered before? For some couples living under the same roof, the experience of closeness was sometimes stifling, while others were learning to manage the relationship from a distance. Some partners lean on each other and become closer, while others may experience tensions. Relationships can improve or deteriorate, depending on the dynamics of the couple.
This pandemic has created financial stress for some households. Some have lost their jobs, had to go on the dole, perhaps decided to change career direction, and so on. Nothing to improve the couple’s relationship!
Good communication is essential to maintaining a balanced relationship. It’s important to take a moment, whether it’s a few minutes or more, to talk with your partner every day. To do this, it’s important to use “I” when talking to your partner. This way, your partner is likely to be more open to discussion and won’t feel “attacked” or judged by your words. It’s good to express our needs, our emotions, our opinions and share what we’re feeling, what we’re experiencing with our partner. I know it’s easier said than done, but the effects are beneficial. Showing compassion and support is something to keep in mind. We all deal with situations in different ways.
That’s why it’s so important to take the time to listen to each other and take in what others have to say. This pandemic may have led us to manage them in a disproportionate way, with more irritants than “normal”. That’s why it’s so important to be indulgent towards others and ourselves. It’s important to remember that a couple doesn’t have to agree on everything. We need to take time out to recharge our batteries on our own, by doing activities or having hobbies we enjoy. Allowing each other space, taking time out for ourselves, helps to restore balance.
Be that as it may, the pandemic has confronted us with our expectations as a couple, in our love relationships. It has turned our intimate relationships upside down, and may well transform existing patterns of love.
By Karyne Vaillant, Call Coordinator